The Celestial Body a chapbook of poetry by Treston Melvin

Mother

The storm grew strong while my body grew weak My smile fades as my tears seem to race The skies went gray as my face went pale I was the storm Mother Nature made Her eyes were brown and her presence was strong She was warm with a comforting embrace Her skin was golden and had a soft glow She was sun to wash me away Oh! Mother Nature, how we have betrayed you Made you body damn near see through They claim to love and cherish you well But all they do is take time to themselves We preach our love, and we preach our care We don’t love you more than we love our damn hair The products we use are products of your death But what we don’t know is we’re! *gasp* running! *gasp* out of breath We cry for the rivers and weep for the trees But make paper planes with what used to be your leaves We steal your home just to make it ours But kill the animals we hold captive… what we call “pets” What we take to vets for the sickness that we have caused The hate that we give to the things that we love You take these animals from where they belong Because all your daughter asked for on Christmas was a dog One that she plays with for a day One that she forgets about on weekends Yes, I am guilty, but yes, I’ll admit I am the storm that is killing the sun But you can’t make me feel guilty for the things you’ve done

If Only

I gave you what you wanted so you would go away But the more I gave the more you seemed to stay I remember the smell of the bleach on the tiles The floor that I fell on unwillingly for you You followed me around like a lost dog needing comfort Made me feel bad when I wouldn’t give But I’m tired of giving, especially to you I’m tired of doing things I don’t want to do But you make it so hard to grab the handle on the door Before you beg, beg, beg for me to give you more “Get off of me now” I wish I could reply If only you could not see the fear in my eyes “Please let go of me!” I say in my mind If only I was brave enough to escape in time Escape! Escape! I feel my body weaken! I *gasp* feel my breath shorten Death is getting closer, I know I can’t avoid it! ‘Till after you stop, and I can breathe again But you left a permanent scar when you said you loved me If only you were a man Who Said?

Who told you that you were allowed to hurt me? Who said that I was prepared for your pain? Why did you think it was a good idea to break me? Wouldn’t be the first time I felt the harsh rain I cry when you smile and I know it sounds cruel I don’t want to see you happy, guess I am a fool I smile when you’re alone because it’s comforting It’s not supposed to be but it’s a comfort to break rules You taught me that Nonetheless I dissolve into nothingness bit by bit Broken pieces peel, passionately parting from my lips You smile at her the way you would at me Who said you were allowed to move on? Definition

You love me the way that you move

Slowly and with a purpose

I never felt love before you

Now I feel it, and I wish I hadn’t

Ive committed to a phantasm

A figment of imagination

Love is a light lift when labels do not matter

Love is a small sound safe within large crowds

Love is the done deal when death does not reach you fast enough

Love is the one thing we used to distract us from the world

That was my definition of love

But my definition was wrong

Love is, “an intense feeling of deep affection”

And that was something you fooled me into thinking I had P.S. I’m Lying

I’ve been crying rivers And drowning in my tears They say that we are sinners But the sin is you aren’t here You make me feel guilty for defending myself You turned a spark into a flame and called it magic Broke my heart into pieces and called it tragic No, it’s not tragic, it was something to embrace But you make me feel guilty for the tears on my face “Stop making me cry” I practically beg Don’t make me feel guilty for the problems you made I know, I know you have no regret But please don’t make me feel enough for the both of us Don’t make me pay for the pain you planned Don’t make me run from the rain in your hand DON’T make me cry for the crimes you committed I’m tired of being used and I can finally admit it

P.S. I’m lying… I can’t admit it. Bury Me

Bury me peacefully, and sink me in the ground 6 feet under so I won’t be disturbed Let them walk on my grave and leave their footprints I won’t feel it anyway, all I felt was the dirt The dirt that you threw in my face when I died Then you closed the lid and threw more around the sides Up, up, up ‘till you can’t see it anymore Bury me to forget me because I guess that’s what it is for Most importantly, Bury me with your secrets Bury me with your lies I wonder if these people know I am here from your knives The ones in my back, the ones you used to kill me Now you’re standing here knowing you won Knowing you killed me without regret You buried me with roses but the red is from your love That poured out of me after you stabbed me You’re standing here like you beat me I guess I am defeated But no, you don’t deserve to be here in attendance Don’t worry, I know that I am all gone You buried me, but I’ll haunt you when it’s all said and done

Trepidation

No, fear is not a concept, fear is always real Do not tell me I’m crazy, you don’t know what I feel You put me in a bag and that’s the only place I go Fear may be a concept, but trepidation is known

8 P.M. It was 8pm that night

i got to know you more

I realized my time was wasted

when you walked through the door

a new person, a new man

it’s something to explore

to love me, you promised

to love me, you swore

maybe I’m better off

i don’t believe in fate

how when one guy goes away

I’m one closer to my “soulmate”

i wish his broken promises

didn’t sound so great

because to love me, he swore

that night at 8

Mother’s Little Baby

Hold me close in the arms that raised me

Hold me like you did when I was young

Remember when I was mother’s little baby

Remember when I was just your son?

I beg for you to see me as your child

I beg for you to love me the same

I beg for you to hear my goals and smile

You grip my heart to keep me here

To keep you sane

I am not mother’s little baby

I will not be put second to your one

You leave my room and I seem all shaky

Because I miss you like Winter misses sun

Someday you’ll cry, but my feelings will be mild

I won’t be here to see your tears

Someday I’ll be gone and you’ll sigh through your trials

I can’t wait to see those years

Jessica Jessica was girl who was only 17 She lived to die in her broken dreams She was away from her home which crushed her so But she laughed because crying wasn’t good for the soul She saw the world in more ways than one She loved the moon more than she loved the sun She thought of her life in glitter and gold Does she know she’ll be great when she grows old These people will go and so will these years You’ll forget those exes, but you won’t forget the tears I found shelter in Jessica because her heart was sewn She found shelter in me because I reminded her of home

Ivy I thought ivy was poison, but she was the remedy She was venomous to herself, but never to me I thought her leaves were pretty, but she never did She was her murderer, but the reason I lived I don’t think she knows the impact she has I don’t think she knows her talent, and skill I don’t think she wants to see the past But the past is where ivy learned to live She looked into my eyes with a smile on her face I saw beauty with a warm and comforting embrace Oh, she was sweet and calm to my dismay I saw her thrive, but she thought she was wilting away

Curves My body is more than you see from outside I hold my stretch marks and hair with pride The way she folds when I sit down in a chair Then she stretches out flat when I lie down with care You say you dislike my chest and my waist Say I am not walking up to your pace Go to the gym it’s not hard you may think But I love myself, every crack curve and kink I don’t care what you think about me I don’t care about you clipping my wings I will not be put down I will soar with these curves Because at the end of the day I look in the mirror and love her I love who I am whether you do or not I used to hate my body, but now she’s a beautiful thought She’s not perfect— sure, but who decides perfection? She’s not all you want and more, but she’s mine and that’s enough She’s ethereal, she’s beautiful, she’s big, and unnoticed She’s angelic, she’s flowing, she’s large, and focused She’s loving, she’s caring, she’s all that I need She’s more than what you see on the outside of me Think about why you’re so worried about her Think about what draws you to look at her Think about her and what you can’t see My curves are mine in every degree

A chapbook is traditionally a short (15-25 pp) collection of poetry, essays, or short fiction.

Treston Melvin is a sophomore (class of 24). An actor, singer, and writer, Melvin is active in Delmarva Theater Academy.